10 Ways to Help Your Teen
make Wise Decisions
  • Give your teen the opportunity to make choices about food, clothes, and other non-critical areas even when it is easier to simply issue a command.
  • Ask for your teen’s opinion about what should be done in various situations.
  • Let your teen be the one to decide if more practice on a task or skill is needed before trying something harder.
  • Permit your teen to decide how to solve problems, even though you would find it quicker to provide a solution. Explore together the possible consequences if certain choices are made.
  • Let your teen offer concrete evidence to show a readiness for new privileges or responsibilities.
  • When conflicts arise, request that your teen take some responsibility for resolving them in a way that will work for all involved.
  • If your teen is angry, have him or her cool down rather than make a rash decision.
  • Give your teen the space to make poor (but not life-threatening) decisions. Teens, like us all, often learn from mistakes.
  • Offer your support and understanding when your teen makes mistakes in judgment. Then discipline as needed.
  • Acknowledge your teen’s good decisions. Point them out when made and refer to them when future decisions are required.
 
10 Ways to Communicate
with Your Teen
  • Make yourself available for talks and try to have them each day. At the same time, be respectful of your teen’s privacy and need for silence.
  • Offer praise when deserved and remember to express your love, even if your teen acts like it doesn’t matter. It does.
  • Show that you are paying attention: use good eye contact and ask for clarification if needed.
  • Be positive and encouraging, and choose words and concepts that teens understand.
  • Rather than jump to conclusions, give your teen a chance to explain thoughts and actions.
  • Ban communication-stoppers such as guilt, commands, ultimatums, preaching, judging, or words like "never" or "always".
  • Be brief. Most teens tune out nagging, and retain shorter messages longer.
  • Practice win-win communication. A healthy compromise with both parties feeling like winners helps teens learn negotiation skills.
  • When the consequence of a conflict won’t harm your teen, give him or her the opportunity to disagree without being accused of "talking back". Your teen will gain self-respect.
  • Don’t feel you have to know everything. Its OK to say, "I don’t know, but let’s find out together."
 
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